Initiating Sex
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Monthly Tip - Feb 2007
presented by...
"Lap Dance Unleashed"
www LapDanceUnleashed com
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Here's a recent question I received about initiating sex.
Q: What's your take on women initiating sex?
My old boyfriend used to love it when I'd throw him down on the
sofa at random moments in the day, and start ripping his clothes
off.
He said it was one of the sexiest acts a woman had introduced him
to.
Recently, I tried this on my current boyfriend and he got really
uncomfortable.
I was left feeling humiliated, hurt, and angry. I put myself out
there, made myself vulnerable to him by coming on to him like that,
and I got shot down- what gives?
Don't guys want a woman who can keep up with them sexually? Do they
expect us ladies to sit there looking pretty, leaving them to do
all the work? Do I just wait until HE is in the mood?
Please help!
ANSWER: Yup, rejection hurts.
First of all, you live in the 21st century where women are no longer
confined to the kitchen, restricted from voting, or forced to marry
old dudes with money. (Well, ok, there are a few Anna Nicole Smiths
out there).
You can certainly initiate sex with your partner when YOU want it.
3 things you need to keep in mind (#3 is my favorite)
1.Every guy is different. Perhaps your old boyfriend was all about
an aggressive woman taking control, but the one you have now likes
a softer approach.
This doesn't mean you have to refrain from making any moves at all
on him. You just might have to come at it with a slightly softer,
even shy (kind of like a school girl) approach.
2.Maybe, he just needed a few moments to switch gears, and get his
mind off a work.
Remember that men have one track minds (and that doesn't just go
for sex) unlike women who are highly successful multi taskers.
Stress can kill a love life. Give him a bit of time to unwind then
approach him so he can give his full attention to you.
3.And most importantly - ask him.
Most women make the mistake of 'talking' or asking the classic
'what are you thinking?'
So, ask him how he likes it. But don't leave it open ended. Give
him multiple choices "Do you like it when I am soft, aggressive,
shy, rough, attack you, late in evening, morning etc...?"
If he doesn't want to talk at least you've narrowed it down by the
grunts to your answers and can give him what he wants next time.
to initiating sex,
J
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